The initials “BDSM” stand for Bondage and Discipline (BD), Dominance and Submission (DS), and Sadism and Masochism (SM). BDSM isn’t solely about eroticism or power dynamics. It covers a wide spectrum of practices, activities, and relationship dynamics centered on power exchange, trust, and explicit consent. Unfortunately, BDSM often gets misrepresented in mainstream culture as solely aggressive or violent, which is a harmful stereotype. This article from The Independent does a great job dispelling these common myths. BDSM places a focus on informed consent and clear communication; everything must be negotiated before play begins, and safe words are established.
To break this acronym down further:
BD: Bondage and Discipline: This often involves using psychological or physical restraints ranging from fuzzy cuffs to ropes, and leather restraints. Acts such as spanking and whipping administered consensually fall under discipline.
D/s: Dominance and Submission: D/s is about power dynamics, in which the dominant partner takes control and the submissive one gives up control conceptually.
SM: Sadism and Masochism: Sadism means one derives pleasure from inflicting pain, be it physical or psychological, and masochism involves deriving pleasure from receiving it. This can range from a sensual spank to more intense whipping.
Most importantly, BDSM is a spectrum and the intensity that works for one person won’t work for everyone. More people sit on the BDSM spectrum than they realize, from those who enjoy a little light choking in bed to those who want to be controlled or spanked. Most importantly, BDSM is about consent.
Numerous websites offer a wealth of information for those seeking to learn more.
The New Bottoming Book provide excellent overviews of BDSM dynamics and practices